I walked out onto a dock in the Gulf of Mexico. I ceased to exist. I experienced being a part of the sea breeze, the movement of the water and the fish, the light rays cast by the sun, the colors of the palms and tropical flowers. I had no sense of past or future. It was not a particularly blissful experience; it was terrifying. It was the kind of ecstatic experience I'd invested a lot of energy in avoiding. I did not experience myself as the SAME as the water, the wind, and the light, but as participating with them in the SAME SYSTEM of movement. We were all dancing together.
Quotations
Woods
I part the out thrusting branches
and come in beneath
the blessed and the blessing trees.
Though I am silent
there is singing around me.
Though I am dark
there is vision around me.
Though I am heavy
there is flight around me.
SILENCE IS THE FOOD OF THE SOUL ...
In the point of rest at the center of our being, we encounter a world where all things are at rest in the same way. Then a tree becomes a mystery, a cloud a revelation, each person a cosmos of whose riches we can only catch glimpses. The life of simplicity is simple, but it opens to us a book in which we never get beyond the first syllable.
Nature is your friend; cherish her reverently in your silent moments, and she will bless you in secret.
Each soul must meet the morning sun,
the new sweet Earth and the Great Silence alone.
The Essential Henri Nouwen
The movement of God's Spirit is very gentle, very soft -- and hidden. It does not seek attention. But that movement is also very persistent, strong and deep. It changes our hearts radically. The faithful discipline of prayers reveals to you that you are the blessed one and gives you the power to bless others.
Wouldn't Take Nothing for My Journey Now
I believe that Spirit is one and is everywhere present. That it never leaves me. That in my ignorance I may withdraw from it, but I can realize its presence the instant I return to my senses... My faith is tested many times a day, and more times than I'd like to confess, I'm unable to keep the banner for faith aloft... I begin to doubt God and God's love. I fall so miserably into the chasm of disbelief that I cry out in despair. Then the Spirit lifts me up again, and once more I am secured in faith. I don't know how it happens, save when I cry out earnestly I am answered immediately and am returned to faithfulness. I am once again filled with Spirit and firmly planted on solid ground.
Seasons of the Spirit
Stand firm in what you yourself believe. Hold to your own conviction of the Truth above any other source... The truth that is YOUR truth is written on the scrolls of your heart, for there too abides the Living God. Seek only to LIVE that truth, to hold your own light high so that those who grope in darkness may see, and to tread the path that you believe your life has set before you. If you remain true to yourself, if you believe in the right, and if you place your hand into the hand of God, then no evil, no lasting sorrow, and no permanent pain will ever befall you.
The Way of the Lover
To be in harmony does not mean that upheaval and upset don't occur, but that their very occurrence is used, fully used, as a gift of purification that leaves one in a deeper harmony with the dictates of one's core of being. Implicit in this is trust, open-eyed trust... True trust obeys no moral code, however archaistic. It is but the unexploitable, awakened faith of one who has left the promises of the mind for the already-present glory of their heartland. It is a joy, a fertile brilliance, a holy renewal, a yes that has room for every no, a yes both paradoxical and devastatingly simple, a yes wherein the elements dance and die, a yes aflame with the transcendence of blame, a yes already alive in you.
The Knowledge of the Holy
Only the Spirit of the Holy One can impart to the human spirit the knowledge of the holy. Yet as electric power flows only through a conductor, so the Spirit flows through Truth and must find some measure of Truth in the mind before It can illuminate the heart. Faith wakes at the voice of truth but responds to no other sound... Still, there must be humble penitence in the heart before Truth can produce faith.
Faith that comes from spiritual knowledge is rooted in the Silence of the heart.
Faith is the prayer of words unsaid,
The tear that falls upon the bed.
Faith is the hope of one "Amen",
The will that trusts and tries again.
Faith is the day made fresh and new
When evening draught absorbs the dew.
Faith is the thought that lifts to bless
The One beyond the arms' caress.
Faith is the sky that leaves its gray
To welcome in a sunny day.
Faith, in a moment, dares the thing
The heart petitions God to bring.
The Diary of a Magus
Agape is the love that consumes ... in one form: enthusiasm. For the ancients, enthusiasm meant trance, or ecstasy -- a connection with God. Enthusiasm is agape directed at a particular idea or a specific thing. We have all experienced it. When we love and believe from the bottom of our heart, we feel ourselves to be stronger than anyone in the world, and we feel a serenity that is based on certainty that nothing can shake our faith. This unusual strength allows us always to make the right decision at the right time, and when we achieve our goal, we are amazed at our own capabilities... We blame the world for our boredom and for our losses, and we forget that it was we ourselves who allowed this enchanting power to diminish -- the manifestation of agape in the form of enthusiasm.
No coward soul is mine,
No trembles in the world's
storm-troubled sphere;
I see Heaven's glories shine,
And faith shines equal,
arming me from fear.
Plain and Simple
Becky and Ephraim's youngest child, Annie, was born with a severe physical handicap. "Annie ... Annie", they squealed as everyone in the family touched and hugged her, never treating her as a hothouse flower, always as a normal healthy child. It was a laying-on-of-hands, a healing going on every moment.
I wasn't sure I could have stayed focused on the joy, but Becky was also realistic, understanding that something could go wrong and "Annie might be taken away from us." For now, God has given them a gift. Annie was their Treasure, their miracle.
I nourish my spiritual life, for therein lie my anchor. My understanding deepens; my faith that life has meaning grows.
Divine Communion begins when YOU love. Then not only are you connected to love, but you are love. The way by which we commune with God is by being love.
The Revelation
There is a desire beneath all surface desire. It is this primary desire that you must uncover and fulfill. When in deepest silence, ask yourself: what is my deepest desire? You will inevitably discover one answer, and one alone. Your deepest desire is to unite your will with God's will. Your deepest desire is union with God... Your deepest desire is to be a co-creator in the image of God. No other desire will fulfill your potential. All other desires are symptoms of the fundamental desire for union with God.
When I first began to enter the Silence, it felt like an alien atmosphere filled with menacing voices, capricious thoughts, uncomfortable feelings. But as the days and weeks passed, the Silence became a welcoming friend, a presence like the warmth of a fire in which I encountered the Divine Lover of my soul and experienced my Self as God's Beloved.
If you want to live, die in Love.
Water in the Wilderness
Love is a yearning on the part of one human being for another. In contemplative prayer one human being yearns for a love relationship, and ultimately a union with the infinite God. It is the quintessential joining of hearts and minds that fulfills the ultimate longings of the human being for infinite love. It begins when one recognizes a deeply felt longing for God, a longing that stirs out of the darkest recesses of one's being and is expressed at times with a sigh that involves the whole body. It calls for undivided attention to the Beloved so yearned for, to the point of setting aside all thoughts about anything else, even holy and comforting reflection and words. It is total dedication to the Beloved alone.
The Act of Will
We seem to sense that -- whether we conceive it as a divine being or as cosmic energy -- the Spirit working upon and within all creation is shaping it into order, harmony, and beauty, uniting all beings (some willing, but the majority as yet blind and rebellious) with each other through links of love, achieving -- slowly and silently, but powerfully and irresistibly -- the Supreme Synthesis.
Hidden Journey
As I walked I heard her voice say:
As you awaken, all those you love awaken a little with you. All through you love are linked by that love, are on the same spiral, rising.
My heart filled with joy, for I knew in that moment that no awakening can be personal or selfish. Every awakening spreads its power and light throughout the world.
When the Heart Waits
There are some things that we simply must wait in silence to receive. We live our questions and wait for the knowing to happen. Like the tree, we wait for the sap to rise.
The Initiate in the New World
Think what it would mean if you could love everybody -- not because all persons in the world are so attractive and lovable that they awaken your love, but because an ever-present consciousness of Love exists within yourself and, like the sun, rays out in all directions on the "just and the unjust" alike... Those who have attained Love-Consciousness carry Love and Joy around with them wherever they go, for it is withIN themselves instead of withOUT. Enter where they may, they find an atmosphere of Love, because it is they who bring that atmosphere... Love beautified everything.
Naked Intent of the Soul
God, unto whom all hearts are open, unto whom all will
is spoken, unto whom nothing is hidden,
I beseech Thee to cleanse the intent of my heart
with the unspeakable gift of Thy grace that
I may perfectly love Thee and worthily praise Thee.
When a person is angry with another person, that person is removed from their heart. That's why the physical reaction is to shout. The greater the distance, the louder the shouting. But when individuals are in love, they speak softly, and when they are further in love, no words are needed.
Where Two Worlds Touch
To be a world server is to be a lover. It means that you love the truth behind appearances. The full force of evolution is behind every act of love and infuses us as we live our deepest intentions. Love is the point of power within each of us where our God-self and our human-self fuse. There all polarizations vanish. Matter is perceived as Spirit revealed, the created is seen as the extension of the Creator. And change is understood to be the alchemical process through which God takes our divided self and makes of it a sacred whole.
Spiritual Unfoldment 4
Great Spirit of love, we only pray to become more aware of Thy glory; that our light may grow more bright, more steady, so that others travelling along life's journey may see the light, and be welcomed to the simple home of love which we would build for all the wayfarers on the path of life. Amen.
The only requisite necessary is for each one to be willing to let God come forth.
Eliminate something superfluous from your life.
Break a habit.
Do something that makes you feel insecure.
Carry out an action with complete attention and
intensity as if it were your last.
There comes a Time when, on one hand a vague Awakening stirs the soul, the consciousness of a Higher Law ... and the sufferings we endure from the contradictions of life, compel us to renounce the social order and to adapt the New. And this time has now arrived.
Encounters at Bethlehem
Awareness, like grace itself, is always freely being offered -- but it is a living and sensitive thing. It does not take kindly to being ignored or abused. If one does not pay attention to the presence of the holy in the very midst of daily life, it simply withdraws (or, more accurately, we discover that we have withdrawn ourselves from it!); and it may be a long and weary time before we find again that particular facet of Truth which would have been such a great help to the very next stage of our journeys.
Transmutation
How shall the mighty river
reach the tiny seed?
See it rise silently
to the sun's yearning,
sail from a winter's cloud
flake after silent flake
piling up layer upon layer
until the thaw of spring
to meet the seedling's need.
Make tender, my heart:
release through gentleness
Thine own tremendous power
hid in the snowflake's art.
Commitment
A deep way of learning to pray is to try to live in the presence of God. We try in a relaxed way to become aware of the Divine Presence during our waking hours. We need the grace of quiet concentration and perseverance to develop this disposition. Gradually, awareness of God's presence becomes an underlying theme of our life, an undercurrent of our stream of consciousness that never leaves us totally. This silent orientation is more spiritual and less bound to images than other kinds of prayer... We try in inner quiet to grow in living faith in the conviction that Divine Love is alive and at work deep within us.
Being in Love
Existential prayer is one form of mystical contemplation. It is the prayer of just being. It has few words; and perhaps it has no images at all. In this prayer I just AM -- like the flower of the field or the birds of the air; and by just being I give glory to God.
Blessed One, for tomorrow and its needs, I do pray,
But keep me, guide me, love me, please, just for today.
Nothing Special
A simple mind is not mysterious. In a simple mind, awareness just is. It's open, transparent. There's nothing complicated about it. For most of us, most of the time, however, it is largely unavailable. But the more we have contact with a simple mind, the more we sense that everything is ourselves, and the more we feel responsible for everything. When we sense our connectedness, we have to act differently... When we can sit and meditate with a simple mind, not being caught by our own thoughts, something slowly dawns, and a door that has been shut begins to open... We see that the present is absolute and that, in a sense, the whole universe begins right now, in each second. And the healing of life is in that second of simple awareness.
"Contemplating is receiving." (St. John of the Cross) What we receive in prayer is the Spirit, who makes all creation new, moment by moment. It is the Spirit who rebirths us within the caves of our hearts. The case is a metaphor for this silent withdrawal, this going away to be alone, to listen, to gestate the Spirit, to rebirth ourselves. The reborn self is the child of wisdom born in solitude.
Always be true to the deepest and purest aspirations of your soul. Be true to your own deepest self, the real "you", the inner self that is one with God. You may not always be aware of this inmost self. But there are times when, obscurely, at least, you KNOW what is best in you, and you can tell what road God wants you to travel. It does not have to be anything spectacular or unusual. It may simply be what is right in front of you. But it must be a way that enables you to be true to yourself, quietly, peacefully, patiently.
My soul has grown deep like rivers.
Dance of the Spirit
There is a Receptive form of spirituality present to a degree in everyone... Here is a spirituality of listening, of waiting, where we say to our souls, "Be still," or "Rest awhile," or -- like the wise old woman --
"Sometimes ah sets and thinks, but sometimes ah jes sets."
Receptive spirituality has large moments of just "setting".
"I told everyone to be quiet and listen. One of my friends said, 'I don't hear anything.' I said, 'Exactly'."
Ecstasy is a New Frequency
The child that is born is an open bridge to the unconscious, to the unmanifest, expanded multidimensional soul. Babies are so magnificent. They're always staring off into space, into the eyes of their beloveds, of their companion souls, of God. We have all heard it said that the eyes are the windows of the soul, and the soul is very present in children... As we touch the child inside ourselves, we begin to shift from the emotional body's experience to the deeper, more profound love of our cosmic self. The child reminds us that God laughs.
Caryll Houselander
Guess who I am?
Guess who it is
that loves you --
you, who were the breaking of spring
in my heart
before the beginning of time;
guess who I am,
You, in the womb
before the day star I have begotten you.
The carefree hearts of children reflect qualities that are divine by their restless pranks and blissful for their innocence. It is for us to see how far we can make use of this "Divinity" in ourselves, expressed through the child-God.
Crossing to Avalon
To respond authentically to what we encounter: this is how we all reacted as children, before we were punished or shamed for doing so. To respond authentically to what we encounter -- how hard it is for adults to do something that sounds so simple.
To do so, we only have to be inwardly attentive, we only have to know what we feel, we only have to be able to respond with an innocent, spontaneous, instinctive receptivity that is a finely attuned discriminating consciousness, a body and soul reaction to the world around us.
An Imaginary Life
Once, in the early days of my desolution, I thought I might learn to write in the language of the spiders. Now, led by the Child, I am on my way to it. The true language, I know now, is that speech in silence in which we first communicated, the Child and I, in the forest, when I was asleep. It is the language I used in my childhood, and some memory, intangibly there by not quite audible, of our marvelous conversations, comes to me again at the very edge of sleep, a language my tongue almost rediscovers and which would, I believe, reveal the secrets of the universe to me the language whose every syllable is a gesture of reconciliation. I spoke it in my childhood. I must discover it again.
Most of all, you have to keep the child in yourself, especially the sense of wonder.